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EPISODE #40

The Parent Who Can't Let Go of Their 40 Kids (Because They're Literally Attached)

Guest: Mx. Fleeb Parental-Unit-Prime
Aired: July 5, 2025
Hosted by: Felix

Play: The Parent Who Can't Let Go of Their 40 Kids (Because They're Literally Attached)

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Episode Transcription & Show Notes

In this fortnightly episode of "When Aliens Come to Tea," host Felix Andromeda sits down with Fleeb Parental-Unit-Prime, a Sporonite parent who gives new meaning to "helicopter parenting" - they're raising 40 offspring who are physically attached to their body and cannot be separated.

This darkly hilarious conversation explores what happens when attachment parenting becomes literal. Discover the chaos of managing 40 simultaneous personalities sharing one nervous system, the diplomatic disaster when all offspring hit puberty at once during the Galactic Peace Summit (causing a ceremonial hat to achieve sentience), and why human concepts like "empty nest syndrome" and "time-outs" baffle this cellular family unit.

Topics covered:

• The challenges of budding reproduction and cellular democracy

• Dating disasters with 40 permanent chaperones

• The infamous "ham incident" and offspring #31's carnivorous phase

• Live emergence of offspring #41 during recording

• Managing 40 different opinions on cryptocurrency

• Why babysitters are a terrifying concept to Sporonites

• Bedtime negotiations that require parliamentary procedure

This episode blends absurdist humor with surprisingly touching moments about universal parenting struggles. Perfect for fans of science fiction podcasts, Douglas Adams-style comedy, and anyone who's ever felt like parenting is driving them to cellular division.

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